On 26th April, my beautiful daughter Osheen passes away.. Her lungs collapsed and the ventilator instrument had made a big wound on her forehead. She looked so calm and peaceful.. my heart is trembling writing these lines.. It was raining and they handed over Osheens little body to us.. For the first time we carried her, was her lifeless body...
It was like my world has come to an end, i lost all hope and was feeling terrible..
We lived a life of loneliness and depression for months...even now we feel that she is close to us.... I miss you my little pricess Osheen... and I wish you were with me....
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Osheen is born
Preethy was in the Operation theater, and I was waiting outside. I was like a fish out of water at that time, I didn't know whether to be happy or sad, I was greatly distressed but in my distress I knew God was there and watching everything.
Suddenly at about 8:45 PM a loud fire alarm went off in the hospital and all I could see is people running around for fire machines. I stood still and kept watching what was happening, in about 2 mins after the fire alarm had gone off.. The operation theaters opened and I could see a huge machine with computer like devices, tubes and wires, drips coming out and the Neonatologist accompanying a baby. The doctor told me " Congratulations you now have a beautiful baby girl" The baby was born at 8:47 PM.
I didn't have to courage to see the baby, but when I peeped in the incubator I saw the smallest baby I had ever seen, the baby's one eye was open and I think she looked at me for a moment, the baby's head was like it was fall off the body if anyone had to carry her. I didn’t know whether to be happy or sad.
Suddenly at about 8:45 PM a loud fire alarm went off in the hospital and all I could see is people running around for fire machines. I stood still and kept watching what was happening, in about 2 mins after the fire alarm had gone off.. The operation theaters opened and I could see a huge machine with computer like devices, tubes and wires, drips coming out and the Neonatologist accompanying a baby. The doctor told me " Congratulations you now have a beautiful baby girl" The baby was born at 8:47 PM.
I didn't have to courage to see the baby, but when I peeped in the incubator I saw the smallest baby I had ever seen, the baby's one eye was open and I think she looked at me for a moment, the baby's head was like it was fall off the body if anyone had to carry her. I didn’t know whether to be happy or sad.
Our shattered dreams
On 24th April, Preethy noticed some bleeding and we rushed to the hospital. After the doctors examined her, they said that the IUD has burst the water bag and the same has caused infection to the baby and Preethy.
We were sad and confused as in what to do, they tried to control the infection but the WBC count kept on increasing, the doctors put Preethy on Antibiotics and Steroids for the baby's lungs to be strong....
Later the bleeding increased, by then there was only 3 cms water for the baby ( the normal is 10 cms ) we could see the baby getting restless as she knew that something wrong was happening but at the same time her heart beats & moments were normal.
At last the doctors said that if was not safe to keep the baby longer inside and the infection can cause harm to preethy as well.. They said that termination was the best option and if we liked to save the baby the expense will be very very high...
We were left with no option but to tell the doctors to do what they thought was the best, they induced labor 3 times during the night to terminate the baby but Preethy didn't get the labor pains at the same time she was bleeding. At that time we just held each other and cried. when I checked with my insurance company the next morning they agreed to bear 25% of the cost to save child if born alive.
We both decided that we will do everything to save the baby even if that might cost us anything...
I rushed to the doctors and asked them to try and save the baby please, they refused and said that the termination process has started and preethy started to get contractions already.. I pleaded of the doctors to do a Cesarean and try and save the baby.. They said that Preethy is only 25 weeks, and even if the baby is born alive, the chances for it to survive isn't very high. I said please give it a try..
The doctors said, ok it now become a very delicate case, and they rushed with Preethy to the operation theater..
We were sad and confused as in what to do, they tried to control the infection but the WBC count kept on increasing, the doctors put Preethy on Antibiotics and Steroids for the baby's lungs to be strong....
Later the bleeding increased, by then there was only 3 cms water for the baby ( the normal is 10 cms ) we could see the baby getting restless as she knew that something wrong was happening but at the same time her heart beats & moments were normal.
At last the doctors said that if was not safe to keep the baby longer inside and the infection can cause harm to preethy as well.. They said that termination was the best option and if we liked to save the baby the expense will be very very high...
We were left with no option but to tell the doctors to do what they thought was the best, they induced labor 3 times during the night to terminate the baby but Preethy didn't get the labor pains at the same time she was bleeding. At that time we just held each other and cried. when I checked with my insurance company the next morning they agreed to bear 25% of the cost to save child if born alive.
We both decided that we will do everything to save the baby even if that might cost us anything...
I rushed to the doctors and asked them to try and save the baby please, they refused and said that the termination process has started and preethy started to get contractions already.. I pleaded of the doctors to do a Cesarean and try and save the baby.. They said that Preethy is only 25 weeks, and even if the baby is born alive, the chances for it to survive isn't very high. I said please give it a try..
The doctors said, ok it now become a very delicate case, and they rushed with Preethy to the operation theater..
Plans for the new addition
Preethy's health imporved and I was taking all the care I could, we started deciding for names and thinking how the baby will be, whom will it resemble. We started telling Joshua that a new baby is going to come and he would be so excited. Joshua picked his own name for baby and started calling her Folley..He actually wanted to say Smalley but it sould sound as Folley in him babish language.
Eventhing went on well till 23rd April 2010....
Eventhing went on well till 23rd April 2010....
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Preethy's terrible cough
During the first 4 months of pregnancy, Preethy developed a serious cough, we went to the ENT specialist and they advised a few medicines, which didn't improve her condition. At times she would become breathless and would grasp for breath. It was terrible to see her in that condition with me being able to do nothing than just trying to calm her down.
Many friends and relatives advised a lot of homemade medicines and we tried everything under the sun to get rid of the cough but nothing seemed to be working.
Preethy's Gynecologist advised that the cough can bring the baby upwards and there is high risk that the IUD may puncture the water bag leading in an instant miscarriage. We were troubled, sad and helpless...Preethy would hold her tummy and cough to ensure there is some sort of support to the baby. This continued for about 3 months...All we did was to trust in the lord
Many friends and relatives advised a lot of homemade medicines and we tried everything under the sun to get rid of the cough but nothing seemed to be working.
Preethy's Gynecologist advised that the cough can bring the baby upwards and there is high risk that the IUD may puncture the water bag leading in an instant miscarriage. We were troubled, sad and helpless...Preethy would hold her tummy and cough to ensure there is some sort of support to the baby. This continued for about 3 months...All we did was to trust in the lord
Preethy's health Issues.
During the first 4 months of pregnancy, Preethy developed a serious cough, we went to the ENT specialist and they advised a few medicines, which didn't improve her condition. At times she would become breathless and would grasp for breath. It was terrible to see her in that condition with me being able to do nothing than just trying to calm her down.
Many friends and relatives advised a lot of homemade medicines and we tried everything under the sun to get rid of the cough but nothing seemed to be working.
Preethy's Gynecologist again advised us the cough can bring up the baby and there is high risk for the IUD may puncture the water bag leading in an instant miscarriage. We were troubled, sad and helpless...Preethy would hold her tummy and cough to ensure there is some sort of support to the baby. This continued for about 3 months...All we did was to trust in the lord
Many friends and relatives advised a lot of homemade medicines and we tried everything under the sun to get rid of the cough but nothing seemed to be working.
Preethy's Gynecologist again advised us the cough can bring up the baby and there is high risk for the IUD may puncture the water bag leading in an instant miscarriage. We were troubled, sad and helpless...Preethy would hold her tummy and cough to ensure there is some sort of support to the baby. This continued for about 3 months...All we did was to trust in the lord
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